A RANDOM THOUGHT

दुनिया को हकीकत मेरी पता कुछ भी नहीं

इलज़ाम हज़ारों हैं और खता कुछ भी नहीं

दिल में क्या है यह पढ़ न सकोगे

सारे पन्ने भरे हैं लिखा कुछ भी नहीं  

-ANONYMOUS

LITTLE TALKS ABOUT LIFE(4):SOULMATES

                                                                    SOULMATES

 

The concept of soulmates originates from the well known concept of HERMAPHRODITE-the ultimate love legend of Hermes and Aphrodite.A soulmate is recognition by every Hermes of his Aphrodite and vice versa.

In the new age of Rationalism the concept is taken further.The concept has to originate and end in answer to the ultimate question:WHAT IS THE ESSENCE OF BEING HUMAN?AND WHAT IS THE PURPOSE AND OBJECTIVE OF THIS JOURNEY-THE PERIOD BETWEEN BIRTH AND DEATH?

I provide,in all humility,my view on the subject.

ESSENCE OF BEING HUMAN :

1.The instrument of decision making in life:REASON

2.The objective of every action in life:PURPOSE

3.The result of every decision and action:SELF-ESTEEM

(KIND ACKNOWLEDGMENT:AYN RAND:Atlas Shrugged;The Virtue of Selfishness)

But I go further.

 

What is the purpose and objective?In my humble opinion the answer is provided by ABRAHAM MASLOW:Hierarchy of Human Needs:

1. Biological and Physiological needs - air, food, drink, shelter, warmth, sex, sleep, etc.

2. Safety needs - protection from elements, security, order, law, limits, stability, etc.

3. Belongingness and Love needs - work group, family, affection, relationships, etc.

4. Esteem needs - self-esteem, achievement, mastery, independence, status, dominance, prestige, managerial responsibility, etc.

5. Self-Actualization needs - realising personal potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth and peak experiences.

 

Let me go still further acknowledging the expanders of this concept:

1. Biological and Physiological needs - air, food, drink, shelter, warmth, sex, sleep, etc.

2. Safety needs - protection from elements, security, order, law, limits, stability, etc.

3. Belongingness and Love needs - work group, family, affection, relationships, etc.

4. Esteem needs - self-esteem, achievement, mastery, independence, status, dominance, prestige, managerial responsibility, etc.

5. Cognitive needs - knowledge, meaning, etc.

6. Aesthetic needs - appreciation and search for beauty, balance, form, etc.

7. Self-Actualization needs - realising personal potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth and peak experiences.

8. Transcendence needs - helping others to achieve self actualization.

 

This then is the picture friends.

 

We return to our original question:who is a soulmate?

I say that soulmates are not who gaze into each others eyes but LOOK OUTWORD IN THE SAME DIRECTION-they are self actualizers with similar cognitive needs referred above.But is that enough?What about emotions and physicalities?.We revisit the HERMAPHRODITE LEGEND.

The picture is completed by the ultimate union of PHYSICS(SEXUAL DESIRE AND FULFILLMENT)AND CHEMISTRY(EMOTIONAL UNION AND BONDING-looking at each other and understanding without speaking,being fully with each other even in silence,revelling and comforting in it.)

 

SO- SOULMATING IS A BONDING OF TWO SELF ACTUALIZERS, BOUND IRRESISTIBLY ,IRRETRIEVABLY AND IRREVERSIBLY BY  COSMIC PHYSICS AND CHEMISTRY.

AND,

SOULMATES ARE A TRUE RATIONAL SELF ACTUALIZING UNION OF HERMES AND APHRODITE.

 

DIL KI BAAT

न किसी की आँख का नूर हूँ, न किसी के दिल का क़रार हूँ
जो किसी के काम न आ सके, मैं वो एक मुश्त-ए-ग़ुबार हूँ

न तो मैं किसी का हबीब हूँ, न तो मैं किसी का रक़ीब हूँ
जो बिगड़ गया वो नसीब हूँ, जो उजड़ गया वो दयार हूँ


मेरा रंग रूप बिगड़ गया, मेरा यार मुझसे बिछड़ गया
जो चमन ख़िज़ां से उजड़ गया, मैं उसी की फ़स्ल-ए-बहार हूँ


पए-फ़ातेहा कोई आये क्यूँ, कोई चार फूल चढ़ाये क्यूँ
कोई आ के शम्मा जलाये क्यूँ, मैं वो बेकसी का मज़ार हूँ

मैं कहाँ रहूँ मैं कहाँ बसूँ न यह मुझसे खुश न वोह मुझसे खुश

मैं ज़मीन की पीठ पे बोझ हूँ,मैं फलक के दिल का गुबार हूँ

 

न किसी की आँख का नूर हूँ, न किसी के दिल का क़रार हूँ
जो किसी के काम न आ सके, मैं वो एक मुश्त-ए-ग़ुबार हूँ

This ghazal was written by Bahadur Shah Zafar, the last Mughal Emperor when he was exiled to Rangoon, Burma after the 1857 Indian war of independence .He later died there.

LITTLE TALKS ABOUT LIFE (3):AN URBAN TRAGEDY

THE GREATEST HUMAN TRAGEDY OF MODERN URBAN MIDDLE CLASS INDIA ESP.YOUNG WOMEN,IS THIS-LACK OF PERCEPTION AND PERSPECTIVE .ADD INEXPERIENCE AND IGNORANCE TO IT AND TOP IT UP WITH SOCIAL TABOOS AND UNNATURAL ROLE DEFINITIONS AND THE RECEIPE FOR A DEPRESSED AND FRUSTRATED LIFE IS READY.

SAMPLE THIS-A WELL EDUCATED WOMAN READY TO EMBARK ON A SELF FULFILLING PROFESSIONAL LIFE AND ECONOMIC INDEPENDENCE IS SHOT DOWN MY THE GREAT INDIAN HOAX CALLED “TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE”-WITHOUT THE EMPOWERMENT OF MONEY,WITHOUT SELF ACTUALIZING LIFE OBJECTIVES,AND COMPLETE IGNORANCEABOUT CATACLYSMIC CHANGES THAT “MARRIAGE”CAN BRING.

IS IT ANY WONDER THAT THE MAXIMUM NUMBER OF DEPRESSION,SUPPRESSION AND EMOTIONAL REPRESSION CASES REPORTED TO CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGISTS ARE WOMEN OF URBAN INDIA?

TAKE TABOO AREAS FIRST.WOMEN CANNOT AND DO NOT AND IN SOME CASES REFUSE TO BE EDUCATED ABOUT-

1.WHY DO MEN MARRY?

2.THE GREATEST BEDROOM TRAGEDY-THE PHYSIOLOGY AND PSYCHOLOGY OF SEX(OH GOD!I CANT,I WONT)IS IT ANY WONDER THAT BEDROOMS ARE JUST PHYSICAL RELEASE CENTERS OF FRUSTRATED MALE LIBIDO WHERE WOMEN DREAD TO ENTER AND ARE PLACES TO ENDURE AT BEST FOR THEM?

GENDER NEUTRAL ISSUES-

3.THE MEANING AND PURPOSE OF HUMAN LIFE.

4.IF HAPPINESS IS THE GOAL-HOW DO WE ENSURE LASTING HAPPINESS?

5.THERE IS BUT ONE SLAVERY-ECONOMIC.HAVE WE WORKED HARD ENOUGH TO ESCAPE THAT?

6.NEED HIERARCHY OF HUMANS-NEED FOR SELF ACTUALIZATION BEING THE TOPMOST-WHAT HAVE WE DONE TO ACHIEVE IT?

7.WHAT IS THE ESSENCE OF HUMAN LIFE?

THIS IS NOT MERE PHILOSOPHY-ITS COMMON SENSE-ARE WE SO BUSY LIVING THAT WE DO NOT EVEN WANT TO KNOW HOW TO LIVE ?

CLUE AS TO WHERE TO LOOK FOR AN ANSWER:

"YOU CAN'T LOOK AFTER OTHERS,IF YOU DON'T LOOK AFTER YOURSELF."

"IF YOU DON'T LOOK AFTER YOURSELF,NOBODY ELSE WILL."

LITTLE TALKS ABOUT LIFE (2): VECTOR QUANTITIES

                                               “IF YOU DREAM,BELIEVE IN THEM.”

 

THERE IS A NEO PSYCHOLOGICAL SCOOL OF COUNSELLING EMERGING WHICH EMPHASIZES ON WHAT ARE NOW COMING TO BE REGARDED AS AXIOMS OF SATISFIED LIVING.SAMPLE THESE.

1.”KOI GAL NAHIN/KOI LOAD NAHIN”-IN PLAIN ENGLISH-EVERYTHING GOES MAAN.ITS OK.

2.DONT TAKE LIFE SERIOUSLY-TRANSLATION-TRIVIALIZE THINGS.

3.WHY WORRY?WHY QUESTION?WHY STAND OUT?WHY NOT “BLEND”?

YOU CAN ADD TO THIS LIST INDEFINITELY.

MY SIMPLE ANTITHETICAL PROPOSITION IS-ALL PROGRESS IS A RESULT OF DISSATISFACTION.TILL YOU REFUSE TO COMPROMISE AND BE A MASTER OF YOUR OWN FATE YOU WILL NOT REACH ANYWHERE.

THERE IS A GLARING ILLUSTRATION OF A YOUNG WOMAN PROFESSIONAL I KNOW.TREMENDOUS TALENT,GREAT APTITUDE,EXCEPTIONALLY HARDWORKING-BUT HURTLING TOWARDS A SETTLED MATRIMONY WITH AN UNKNOWN PERSON”CHOSEN”BY THE WISE MEN IN THE FAMILY.ALL THE WHILE RECOGNIZING THE DECADENT SOCIAL VALUES AND TRIVIALIZING OWN TALENT AND SAYING “I MAY BECOME VERY HAPPY TOO”.””I MAY BE ABLE TO WORK TOO”.   WE INDIANS HAVE A CHILD LIKE CAPACITY OF SELF DELUSION.WE ARE COMPULSIVE GAMBLERS-AND WE GAMBLE NOT WITH MONEY,BUT OUR LIVES.

 

CONSENTING TO A DESTINY CHOSEN FOR YOU BY SOCIETY IS THE ULTIMATE BETRAYAL OF ALL HUMAN VALUES.AND THE FINAL IRONY IS THAT ALL THIS WHILE YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART THAT YOUR DREAMS LIE ELSEWHERE.

FOR YOUNG, ASPIRING AND CAPABLE WOMEN IN PARTICULAR THE SURRENDER TO THE GREATEST INDIAN OBSESSION-“MARRIAGE”-IS PROBABLY ONE OF THE GREAT TRAGEDIES WHICH ARE NOT SPOKEN ABOUT.

BUT WHY WHINE?-WHEN WE CONSENT TO SUPREMACY OF VALUES WE NEITHER ENDORSE,NOR UNDERSTAND HOW CAN WE ESCAPE THE LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES THEREOF?WHY BEMOAN THE FATE WE CHOSE?

NEWTON’S THIRD LAW IS NOT JUST A LAW OF PHYSICS-IT IS A LESSON OF LIFE-“EVERY ACTION HAS AN EQUAL AND OPPOSITE REACTION”-JUST APPLY IT AND YOU WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT I MEAN.

AND MINDLESS PURSUIT OF A ROTE LEARNED PROFESSIONAL ROUTINE IS EQUALLY SELF DEFEATING.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?AND WHY?

BE A VECTOR QUANTITY,NOT A SCALAR ONE.

IT TAKES A TOLL ON YOUR PHYSICAL HEALTH TOO-PROFESSIONAL BURNOUTS AND MARITAL DISHARMONY ARE TOO WELL KNOWN.IF YOUR MIND SUFFERS ,YOUR BODIES WILL SUFFER TOO.

REMEMBER THE INEVITABILITY OF TIME.

LIFE WILL NOT ONLY ASK YOU SEARCHING QUSTIONS BUT DEMAND ANSWERS-AND YOU WILL BE LIKE A RABBIT CAUGHT IN BLINDING HEADLIGHTS.

LET ME COME BACK TO MY ORIGINAL PROPOSITION.YOU ARE HAVING A GOOD TIME BECAUSE SOMEONE SOMEWHERE DECIDED TO WORK ,DECIDED TO WORK WELL,AND PROBABLY HAD A GREAT TIME WORKING WELL.

LOOK AT YOUR CONVENIENCES AND UTILITIES THAT ARE A UNCONSCIOUS PART OF YOUR EXISTENCE-BUT INDISPENSABLE-INTERNET,CELL PHONE,SATTELLITE TELEVISION……..SOMEONE,SOMEWHERE IS WORKING-CONSTANTLY,RELENTLESSLY,SINGLE MINDEDLY,PURPOSEFULLY………

JUST THINK OF THE DAY THOSE SELF ACTUALIZERS CHOSE TO STOP……OR DO A BAD JOB……

NOT SO DIFFICULT TO IMAGINE-IF IT IS, READ “ATLAS SHRUGGED”BY AYN RAND.JOHN GALT AND THE”STRIKE”.

TO REVERSE A MODERN LIFE AXIOM-PARTY HARD-BUT WORK HARDER.

IF YOU HAVE THE VISION TO DREAM,HAVE THE COURAGE TO REALIZE THEM.

“AWAKE.ARISE.AND STOP NOT TILL THE GOAL IS REACHED”-NOT MY WORDS.THEY HAPPENED TO BE SPOKEN BY A GENTLEMAN YOU ALL PROBABLY KNOW.

HIS NAME WAS SWAMI VIVEKANANDA.

 

BAARISH

"बारिश" ने कहा कि कोशिश में कमी रह  गई, 

इसीलिए तुम्हारी आँखों में नमी रह गई

हाथ छूटा क्योंकि तुम्हारी ही  पकड कमजोर थी ,

वर्ना खुशियों कि तुम्हारी ही हाथोँ मेँ  डोर  थी

तो कुल मिलाकार  गल्ती  हमारी  ही  निकली,

थूकता हूँ अपने उपर कि कहाँ की  बात निकली

गम कि नुमायश करने का  यही  अँजाम है दोस्तोँ, 

यह धरोहर बड़ी अनमोल है दोस्तों

गम समझने को तैयार कौन कब है ,

ख़ुशी और हंसी के ही  साथी सब हैँ

तो मेरी तरह बेइज़्ज़त मत होना, 

आंसुओं को आँखों में ही पिरोना

बना के सबको अपना देख लेना, 

कहोगे मेरी तरह देख लेना

दिल की बातों को कहाँ कहा जाता  है, 

दर्द को बांटा नहीं सहा जाता  है